Funk Off! Soothing Cream


Soothing all-natural skin cream for sensitive areas prone to moisture-induced rashes and irritations.



Funk Off! Soothing Cream

The reality of everyday life is sometimes our bodies get… funky. And not in a good way. Our Funk Off! Soothing Cream is made to sooth all of the raw, rubbed, moist, chafed, stinky areas. This works for those sensitive parts on our bodies in particular, such as the groin area, under-boob, underbelly and armpits. Whether you currently have a rash or tend to break out in a rash in those areas, this is the cream for you! Funk Off! Soothing Cream is excellent as an anti-chafing cream in addition to helping combat fungus and bacteria in moist areas. It also works well as a natural alternative to commercial deodorants and antiperspirants. It has been tested in tough, high-heat environments such as the Black Rock Desert and El Mirage to great success! Now it’s your turn to get the funk off…

All Simple Apothecary products are hand crafted with healing intentions in small batches. No synthetic emulsifiers are used, so natural separation may occur in higher temperatures- simply stir the product before use. No synthetic preservatives are used, so natural spoilage will occur over time. Please use within 6 months of opening. Refrigeration in warmer temperatures may help prevent spoilage.

Simple Apothecary is a small, family-owned business. All products are handcrafted in small batches, with care taken to ensure each jar is made to exacting standards and set with healing intentions. As such, we do not make large amounts of any product at one time. This occasionally means there are small delays in order fulfillment- we genuinely appreciate your patience AND your business!

Additional information


2 ounce jar, 4 ounce jar


Simple Apothecary strives to use sustainably sourced ingredients, using local suppliers as much as possible. All ingredients are organic and non-GMO whenever possible.

Shea butter, coconut oil, non-nano zinc oxide, witch hazel, jojoba oil, beeswax, lanolin, a proprietary blend of essential oils and vitamin E oil.

*This product contains beeswax and lanolin.

The Back Story

Rebecca Finn, owner of Simple Apothecary, created this recipe to deal with the side-effects of a vitamin B12 deficiency that resulted in deep and painful fissures in her lips. Although many of the commercial products helped to an extent, even high-quality ones from natural food stores were never enough to make her lips feel healed. Becca even tried applying her basic cannabis salve to her lips in the hopes of healing them. Although the salve worked well at healing the cracks, it wasn’t quite the right combination of moisturizers to prevent new ones from forming. This sent Becca to the kitchen for research and development on her own recipe for a lip balm.

There were two major objectives to be achieved with the creation of this recipe- soothe and heal any open wounds, while preventing the formation of any new ones. As a lip balm, the new recipe outperformed any other product tried to that point (and since!). Not to mention the balm brought a lovely, almost velvety sheen to the lips! Another lovely effect was that after a while of applying any leftovers from the lip application to dry cuticles, it proved to be just as beneficial there! The lip balm rightfully from there on out became the “Cannabis Lip and Cuticle Balm”.


(a) These statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. Please use caution with any new product, including those that are all-natural and plant based.

(b) No advice: These statements are not intended to give advice. Our website contains general medical information. The medical information is not advice and should not be treated as such.

No warranties: The medical information on our website is provided without any representations or warranties, express or implied. Without limiting the scope of this section, we do not warrant or represent that the medical information on this website: will be constantly available, or available at all; or is true, accurate, complete, current or non-misleading.

Medical assistance: You must not rely on the information on our website as an alternative to medical advice from your doctor or other professional healthcare provider. If you have any specific questions about any medical matter, you should consult your doctor or other professional healthcare provider. If you think you may be suffering from any medical condition, you should seek immediate medical attention. You should never delay seeking medical advice, disregard medical advice or discontinue medical treatment because of information on our website.

Interactive features: Our website includes interactive features that allow users to communicate with us. You acknowledge that, because of the limited nature of communication through our website’s interactive features, any assistance you may receive using any such features is likely to be incomplete and may even be misleading. Any assistance you may receive using any our website’s interactive features does not constitute specific advice and accordingly should not be relied upon without further independent confirmation.

Limits upon exclusions of liability: Nothing in this disclaimer will: (a) limit or exclude any liability for death or personal injury resulting from negligence; (b) limit or exclude any liability for fraud or fraudulent misrepresentation; (c) limit any liabilities in any way that is not permitted under applicable law; or (d) exclude any liabilities that may not be excluded under applicable law.

The last portion of this document labeled (b) was created using a template from SEQ Legal (


There are no reviews yet.

Be the first to review “Funk Off! Soothing Cream”

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *